"My features form with a change in the weather," announced John Methuselah Bronstein.
"Yeah, yeah," growled overweight ombudsman Fat Guy Genuine Article. "I'm working on the ultimate music mix. It's a tribute to the greatest."
Jack queried, "The greatest?"
Fatty nodded smugly.
"the greatest WHAT, Fatty?" said Jack.
"THE greatest," Fatty beamed.
Jack sighed, "Fatty, I don't want to have to make any phone calls on you this early in the week."
"Phone calls, Jack?" said Fatty.
Jack said, "Yeah. Phone calls. You've already used up your smart-ass points for March. And Casimir Pulaski Day or NOT? It's only the fifth. By my reckoning, you're on probation for the next 26 days. The spotlight's on you! Shape up."
Fatty bellowed, "You can keep the comments about my weight to a MINIMUM...and you can keep them to YOURSELF. In case you haven't noticed, I'm on diet. Damn straight! I'm going to slim down. Three weeks from now, the FAT JOKES will be on YOU. Heed me well."
Jack shrugged, "Heedwell, indeed. Just remember, this ain't Fat Guy Films. At least, not yet. This is Bronstein Studios. And make no mistake: That's how it is. Did you see anybody named Fat Guy in Tim Burton's 'Ed Wood'? Heh? Did you? No. No, you didn't. Get it right!"
"You're all talk, Jack," scoffed Fatty. I'll hit the big time soon enough. My time will come. So take heed. Heed."
2 comments:
Fat Guy returned to his task--the Rocky Balboa workout mix.
"We begin with Survivor's 'Eye of the Tiger,'" explained Fatty. "Next? 'Tiger's' slowed-down cousin, 'Burning Heart.' We continue with several restatements of Bill Conti's 'Rocky' theme, and conclude, in due course, with the Granddaddy of the Biddaddy of them all--John Cafferty's 'hearts on fire'. Boo-yaa."
random movie quotes
from tv
Ray Luca, Crime Story: "I think I"m bein' hustled here."
Montgomery Burns, the Simpsons: "I'm beginning to think this Simpson is not the negotiating genius I took him for."
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