Saturday, March 31, 2012

about Trayvon Martin


     “There’s disconnect in America,” lamented Fat Guy. “Disconnection.”
     “Right,” said Jack Bronstein. “Like, when you don’t pay your phone bill. Right?”
     Fatty answered, “No. I mean, the way some Americans rot, while the big shots sit there and pamper themselves. There’s no compassion!”
     Jack nodded, “I see what you mean. Are you familiar with the name George Zimmerman, Fatty?”
     Fatty raised an eyebrow.
     Jack said, “Zimmerman wanted to be a policeman. It seems that he shot and killed a man named Trayvon Martin back in February of this year.”
     “Why?” asked Fatty.
     Jack answered, “Zimmerman claims he was defending himself. But eyewitness accounts say otherwise.”
     “See?” sighed Fatty. “No compassion.”
     Jack agreed, “If you have no compassion for people, of course you’ll attack a stranger.”
     Fatty shook his head woefully.
     Jack concluded, “It’s happening everywhere. In a land without compassion, people smile upon murder.”

Monday, March 5, 2012

Jack talks smack

"My features form with a change in the weather," announced John Methuselah Bronstein.
"Yeah, yeah," growled overweight ombudsman Fat Guy Genuine Article. "I'm working on the ultimate music mix. It's a tribute to the greatest."
Jack queried, "The greatest?"
Fatty nodded smugly.
"the greatest WHAT, Fatty?" said Jack.
"THE greatest," Fatty beamed.
Jack sighed, "Fatty, I don't want to have to make any phone calls on you this early in the week."
"Phone calls, Jack?" said Fatty.
Jack said, "Yeah. Phone calls. You've already used up your smart-ass points for March. And Casimir Pulaski Day or NOT? It's only the fifth. By my reckoning, you're on probation for the next 26 days. The spotlight's on you! Shape up."
Fatty bellowed, "You can keep the comments about my weight to a MINIMUM...and you can keep them to YOURSELF. In case you haven't noticed, I'm on diet. Damn straight! I'm going to slim down. Three weeks from now, the FAT JOKES will be on YOU. Heed me well."
Jack shrugged, "Heedwell, indeed. Just remember, this ain't Fat Guy Films. At least, not yet. This is Bronstein Studios. And make no mistake: That's how it is. Did you see anybody named Fat Guy in Tim Burton's 'Ed Wood'? Heh? Did you? No. No, you didn't. Get it right!"
"You're all talk, Jack," scoffed Fatty. I'll hit the big time soon enough. My time will come. So take heed. Heed."